Sunday, May 15, 2011

To understand.

Is it so hard to understand someone? Sometimes...sometimes I just don't. Sometimes I am not understood. When both things happen simultaneously, I feel like throwing my hands in the air and repeating the word 'cuss' over and over.
It's the night before my last two finals. Its the night after a long fun day outside. Its the night where I lay here wondering if I got hit by a train because my body hurts so bad. Its the night where I don't understand and am not understood.
Do I analyze too much? Maybe some things are better off not being looked at too closely. Maybe some things we should look at closely, but have never really given it a thought.
Most of the time I find things don't make sense. Not to me anyway. I feel like a child sometimes going about life thinking I need to get my act together. Sometimes I feel I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. Like somehow I'm not fit to live anymore, or be anything.
Why are people so quick to tell you exactly what you've done to them, but in return don't want to talk about what they did to you. Leaving everything to be your fault and them blameless. What if we first asked what we had done to hurt them? What if we were willing to give second chances and trust someone again completely? What if little unimportant things didn't bother us and we left more things up to God instead of to ourselves? What if we just waited to see what happened? What if...
To understand and to say you understand to someone and really mean it is like...taking a huge rock off someones back. Like by understanding, they now feel able to breath again.
To be understood, is like someone telling you they love you and picking you up on your feet, and walking hand in hand with you.
It feels good to understand, and to be understood. I wish I could feel that right now.

1 comment:

  1. Wow. I'm here with you. Way to put words to the feeling.
    Love you lots and lots.
    I'm thankful for you.
    <3
    Jami

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